Saturday, December 8, 2007

AOG Series: Gangster PSA

This right here?? You know, the thing you’re reading right now?? Yeah, it’s about to be ReaL.. ReaL talk.. feelings will be hurt, some of y’all dudes might start a whole “eff Q.” fan club.. some females might claim that I’m wrong.. or talking about their man.. but hey, what I’m about to say is true.. and ReaL..

This started based on an argument I had w/ a female.. it escalated into a venting session I had w/ my boy/business partner/business twin.. he felt my pain.. it all came together w/ one line that I vented.. “I’m not a per hour nigga!!”..
Listen up while I explain that line to you..

A lot of females say men ain’t shit.. for the most part I can buy that.. and I can return it like a forehand shot from Serena on you, too!! Most women ain’t shit either.. but that’s not what this blog is about.. it’s about the misconceptions that turn into realities.. I’m here to educate some of y’all.. I’m here to cuss out a few of y’all negroes that’s messing it up for men like me..

Here’s the situation.. you take 10 men and put them in a room.. matter of fact, take 10 guys you know or 10 dudes that roll together.. get them in a room.. look at every last one of them.. say hi to them if you want.. 9 of those dudes are wack.. I label them per hour dudes.. 1 of them is straight up and down a man that’s on his J-O.. a good dude.. smart dude.. common sense dude.. call him the salary dude..

So there we have it.. 2 labels.. per hour dude.. salary dude..

Keep in mind that I’m also talking about my friends.. also understand that the per hour dude can one day rise up to be the salary dude.. right now? At this present time? That’s not his desire.. he’s content being a per hour dude.. now let me further break it down for you..

Per hour dude..
This is a dude that can live w/ mom dukes.. can work at your neighborhood game spot.. will get happy about going from $8/hr to $10/hr like he just won the lottery.. this dude will spend all his money on clothes, video games, weed, going to the clubs, etc.. that’s his life.. that’s what his life revolves around.. this is the dude that is down for going to the spot w/ you whenever you hit up his cell phone.. it never fails no matter what he may be doing or what time it may be, if you got at him, he would be down to drop what he’s doing to roll w/ you.. truth be told, that’s a dude I want and have in my circle.. his mindset is different.. he almost has no worries.. his worries revolve around talking about a chick, the cops, that new mixtape cd, or the new pair of jordans.. that’s pretty much it.. he can be a smart dude, too!! He might be able to wax poetic w/ you, but he really doesn’t care..
When you talk about females w/ him, or relationships w/ females, this is the dude that’s quick to tell you that you’re doing too much “for them hoes”.. he’s the dude that’s quick to tell you what he won’t do for a chick, but is also quick to be searching for another one at the club.. spending lunch money on drinks for them.. playing the pimp card and getting happy over getting a females fake number.. bragging that his cell phone is full of “hoes”..
Let me get at you dudes for a second.. I can care less about the numbers in your phone.. truth be told, I can battle you number for number.. and I don’t even hit up the clubs.. truth be told, every number that I have in my phone will still be working 6 months from now.. can you say the same?? And I’m not calling not one of them a hoe.. I mean a label is a label, but dang.. and please understand that if your game is really up to par you don’t have to spend a cent to keep a female around you.. but anyway..

See, for some reason females have per hour goggles.. every dude they see is a per hour dude to them.. granted 90% of the dudes they see are per hour dudes, but when they meet a salary dude they treat him like a per hour dude.. but I’m getting ahead of myself.. let me break down the salary dude for you..

The salary dude is about something.. forget the fact that he can’t get overtime or guarantee that he’ll be out of the office by 5PM.. that comes w/ the territory.. he makes a salary.. he gets percentage raises.. not dollar raises.. working on Saturdays is a no-no for him, unless he’s out of town on business.. or if his career is such that he has to work on weekends..

A salary dude dreams realities.. I don’t mean to get deep on y’all but think on that for a bit.. he’s trying to become something.. he understands construction.. he’s laying down that foundation for a fruitful future for his future family.. tongue twister, I know, but it’s the truth.. can’t build the pyramids in a day or w/out thoughtful planning and careful considerations.. excuse the alliterations.. the salary dude also understands what being a man should entail.. he keeps you on his inside if y’all are walking down the street.. he opens doors for you.. steps off the elevator after you.. removes your coat should you desire him to.. he doesn’t mind spending money on females.. but he understands that spending money on a bunch of females will lead him into financial ruin!! Juggling 5 girls?? Come on fam, why?? 5 different lives.. 5 different headaches.. 5 separate relationship bills?? Stupid.. shoot if you were smart.. nah, lemme not go there.. he understands the value of having a down-ass chick.. and he will deal w/ those relationship headaches if he knows that this chick will be there for him..

Some of my friends joke that I’m always liable to have a chick living w/ me.. I can live w/ that.. my heart is big.. BUT.. please understand one small but big difference.. I’m ABLE to move a chick in w/ me.. I’m able to have a chick eating out of my refrigerator.. you.. the per hour dude?? You don’t have that luxury.. so joke all you want.. i look at my Pop-Pop.. he will spend his hard earned money to care for others.. some of y’all per hour dudes will call him a sucker or just plain stupid.. nah negroes, that’s a man.. that’s a salary man.. he understands the calling of helping others in need when you can.. I learned almost everything I know about being a man from that man..

The salary dude also has some bad traits.. he KNOWS he’s a salary dude.. he’s confident.. he doesn’t feel that he should be treated like a per hour dude.. he feels that he should get away w/ more.. he feels that he should get more slack.. he feels that he should be talked to rather than screamed on.. called a prince, rather than a nigga.. he also tends to feel that if he asks you to jump then you should jump.. BUT.. don’t get it twisted.. he feels that he should act and react the same way.. if you are holding him down, he has no problem w/ jumping when you tell him to..

Please understand what I’m saying.. I am saying that there are a different set of rules for the salary guy.. put it this way, if I’m married to Oprah, she’s def’ going to be treated differently.. I’m not trying to mess that up.. ok, some of y’all might have a hard time thinking of Oprah, so if it’s Halle or Jada, I’m not trying to mess that up.. I’m treating her like I was playing out a scene from Coming to America.. I’m singing “my queeeeeen to beeeee” like I was Luther.. it’s not a game.. that chickenhead?? She ain’t getting treated that way.. nor, in my opinion, should she.. and y’all might not agree.. oh well.. but let y’all get Jordan, Carmelo, Iverson or Boris, y’all know y’all wouldn’t be trying to mess that up!!

But the fact remains, y’all treat salary dudes the same as per hour dudes and y’all need to stop.. we are not the same! I love my boys, but even they’ll tell you that I’m on some next ish.. and that’s not me saying I’m better than them.. it’s just my focus and my mindset is different.. it doesn’t make me better.. it just makes me that salary dude.. not that per hour dude.. again, they can get to where I am, but that’s not their desire..

you can start yelling at me like you don’t have no sense if you want to.. and I will quickly let you know that you can get the eff outta my face.. I will also let you know that I don’t need you.. no disrespect, but it’s the truth.. and if you think that I can’t find a female that won’t agree w/ the words that I’ve stated in this blog, try me.. she’s out there.. I’m waiting for her to show up.. I’m stubborn, I’m confident, and I’m blunt.. as far as I’m concerned, you need to treat me like you understand what a Northwestern University degree stands for.. understand what it’s like having 2 engineering degrees.. understand what Graham School of Business, Kellogg and Columbia University stand for.. understand what excelling at sports while being a nerd (in an academic state of mind) stands for.. realize what the gift of gab stands for.. realize that on any given day I might get a call or email from a person that you might see on CNN or something.. shoot, next time you walk in my crib, look again at those books on my bookshelf.. those aren’t your average books, and I’m not your average per hour dude.. y’all need to realize that all those things combined aren’t found in your average per hour dude’s repertoire.. I’m not saying give up on the per hour men out there.. truth be told, the same applies for females.. there are some per hour females too!!

There are some good per hour men out there.. but I’m just saying don’t treat me like one..

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