Guess Who's Baaaaack..

yes sir.. welcome, welcome, welcome.. after a long hiatus, i'm back in a difference place.. long overdue and a lot of stuff to get outta my head.. my goal is to keep this updated weekly, and turn this into my blog home.. with vlogs (video blogs), my own brand of photojournalism, and anything else i can think of.. it's going to take some time and some effort from my creative friends for the look to be "me", but bear with me..

i currently have old blogs up here, with most of them being a series called Anatomy of a Gangster which is featured at TROUBL.org, but i'll also bring some of my old favorites in one place, as many of you were not able to see them.. this will be my place to rant about any and everything, but hopefully with an educated voice..

i kinda want this to be anonymous, but y'all already know it's me.. my words have nothing to do with my work or ideals of that company that i scream about all of the time.. that company does not necessarily stand by all of the words that i speak in this forum.. i mean, they could, technically, but don't not do business with them based on a highly opinionated blog..

other than that, i just hope y'all enjoy it.. agreeing and disagreeing with me.. don't be silent either.. leave comments.. comment with others.. that bashful stuff doesn't work over hear.. i don't like people that "dip and dap".. i have issues.. the Man is after me.. my phones are tapped.. i'm that Ghetto Boys video.. so, yeah, don't make me even crazier.. argue with me.. tell me i'm stupid and corny.. i can take it, cuz i can def' dish it.. trust..

what does that mean, exactly? trust.. why do we stay shortening sayings? we are too dang lazy.. we dropped a word.. me.. one syllable.. that was putting us over the top, huh? true.. true that.. out.. i'm out.. good? you good?? y'all mickey fickeys are too lazy for me.. but y'all catchy..

why does Usher seem like an old Chris Brown? isn't it messed up that when CB first came out, he was just a younger Usher? now, with Usher having been gone for a minute, marrying his stepmom and ish, he looks like he's trying to be CB.. and what is up with these marriages? can someone name a recent celebrity marriage that looked like it made sense? Jay and Be? i get it.. his swag got her.. but it still don't look right to me.. mariah looks like nick's mom.. kimora is dating a former slave.. janet is dating a troll.. ray j was wooing whitney.. what is going on..

ok, ok, i'm done.. just like this post, my blog is going to be all over the place.. ADD (hopefully) at its' finest..

out.

The Choice is Yours..

Common ground is a lot like common sense.. Sounds good to say.. Everyone understands it.. Not many have it.. Finding the balance, finding a calming place, finding yourself is just not easy.. Too many choices.. This or That.. Hov or Nas.. Beyonce or Rihanna.. Bulls or.. Nah, no choice there.. Corporate or Streets.. Single or Married.. For some Boys or Girls.. For me, Her or Her Too.. Friends or Enemies.. Life or Death..

I like to think that I make choices based on trying to find common ground or a nice balance, but I’ve told myself that I’m not able to do that.. I like to read (hooray for nerds!) and pick apart any and everything.. Breaking things down to the least common denominator.. Over the last 2 weeks or so, I’ve been focused on trying to understand a bit more about myself.. During my self-reflection I read an article about a business man.. Someone we all know.. Doing big things.. The article touched on him being misunderstood.. Everyone saw him as one guy.. He knew he was someone else.. Shoot, I knew he was someone else.. I knew his government.. But his government didn’t allow for him to be much more than those that came before him (which was nothing to really be proud of).. So, he became someone else.. Someone we appreciate.. Now he’s stuck.. He can’t go back.. No one would believe that he’s not this or that.. It appears he no longer has a choice..

Sometimes I feel trapped in a similar dilemma.. We all made choices to do what we do.. I graduated from college and went left instead of right.. During that time I became someone else.. I was no longer myself to many people.. That was a conscious decision I made when I wasn’t conscious of the outcome.. I didn’t have a path to follow.. No one really to look to.. So, like Hov told to Freeway, I kept going.. I remember going back to high school and people being surprised.. Never thought I would be the loud type.. I was always quiet.. Went back to college, and the same.. I wasn’t that quiet, but I wasn’t the dude that was loud about my intentions and goals.. I was the silent type.. Now?? Things don’ changed.. Now? I can’t really go back.. It’s something I have to live with.. I think it’s something that those that I want to follow have to live with as well..

Life has a way of humbling you.. The gangsters get humbled.. Get too big, they’re coming.. Ask Oprah.. Ask Barack.. Ask Hov.. Ask Frank.. Ask Kobe.. Cry a river if you want, but no one is listening.. I needed to be humbled.. I was floating for too long.. I knew I breathed the same air as everyone else, but I wanted to find that new air.. I wanted to walk on it.. I did for a bit.. My heart was in the right place, but my brain wasn’t.. I made too many wrong choices.. I won’t call them bad, cuz I don’t feel that they were.. They were just wrong.. Wanted to be right, even when I knew I was wrong.. Wanted to ride it out.. I rode it out alright! Straight to the demise of a lot that I worked for.. I needed it though.. I made the choice.. Now I feel like I can make another one.. I know I just said I was stuck, but I think my fall has allowed me to change..

I can change.. It’s up to me.. My circle is smaller.. My heart is bigger.. My brain is right there with it..

I’m making the choice to be right.. For me.. For more than me.. For my future.. Here’s to hoping that we all make better choices and we all find people who can steer us in the right direction.. Black Sheep..

Q.

AOG Series: Baby Powder Awards..

Recently we’ve seen a lot of moments that have either angered us, embarrassed us, or called for us to disassociate ourselves with someone or something.. In the spirit of this recent history, I announce AOG’s 1st Annual Baby Powder Awards..

The Baby Powder Awards are given out in the spirit of the strong desire to “smack hot fire” out of some of us.. As AGs, it’s our responsibility to hold each other accountable, but in a manner that speaks in the voice of Riley (Boondocks).. “That’s so not gangsta!”.. So, everyone, hold out your hand, sprinkle some baby powder to lessen your own sting, and get to smacking..

1. Rev. Jeremiah Wright
This one is difficult, but even my Chicagoans can get the five fingers.. Rev. Wright, you know better.. If it wasn’t for Barack’s prowess, you might be up for 2 smacks, but since Obama proved how gangsta he was by providing landslide slaps to Mrs. Clinton, he saved you.. You could have been the scapegoat for Black people losing its opportunity for a Black President.. THE Black President.. You were fine when you started, and they were getting on you about 8 second sound bites.. You were right to be upset.. They didn’t know you.. They shouldn’t have come at you like that.. But, then you took a long break and came back with nonsense.. True to stereotypical form, you were “all late” with your response.. Then you started shucking and jiving like a scene from Bamboozled.. That was so not gangsta! You even called out Barack, when he referred to you as a “spiritual advisor”.. Negro please.. You knew what he was doing.. He was speaking to a larger audience.. Or in your game of semantics, a larger congregation.. People understand “advisors”.. Not everyone has Pastors, Deacons, Church Ladies, etc.. But, here you come acting like he was referring to you like you were Candyman or some other boogeyman.. Congrats, Rev, you’re the first to get smacked..

2. Louis Johnson
Y’all might not know this dude.. Actually, he’s probably about to be more famous by receiving this award, because he was nowhere close to being an AG.. This is the dude at the center of this OJ Mayo story.. If you don’t know, OJ Mayo will be a Top-10 NBA draft pick this year.. Was LeBron after LeBron left high school.. This year he made it look easy as a freshman at USC.. We all knew he was going pro.. He’s been groomed for the NBA.. All of the big players know him.. Carmelo Anthony got him into hot water this year when he gave him tickets to the Nuggets vs. Lakers game.. They are boys, and he was just hooking his friend up.. The NCAA didn’t like that, and OJ had to pay Melo back.. Now, ESPN breaks this story after some sorry former writer/drug dealer comes forward about OJ getting cash and gifts since he was in high school from a “runner” who was provided funds by BDA Sports (a large sports agency headed by a Black man).. This story is only told after Louis was kicked out of OJ’s circle.. I find it funny that this 40-something year old Black man is referred to as OJ’s “former confidant” by all of the media (headed by ESPN).. Really? A confidant? That dude was around OJ for a paycheck.. It’s sad that the media can’t see right through this.. That they can’t see that since he’s been kicked to the curb, that now he wants to do what’s right so that OJ can get the wrong people out of his corner.. Let’s not forget that OJ has done nothing more than work his behind off and become a future NBA star.. Let’s not forget that at 13 he started having all of these old men get at him “in his best interest”.. Really? Now OJ’s world is turned upside down and everyone is looking at him as just another Black athlete getting paid to play a sport.. Getting money because he’s good.. Puh-leeze.. If the NCAA, ESPN, or any other media outlet wants to really crack down, let’s look deeper.. Let’s do an analysis of some of these baseball players that get jobs and other perks that no one talks about.. Louis? Who are you?? You tried to be a pseudo sportswriter, then a pseudo drug dealer/addict, then a “confidant”, and now a snitch.. I have 2 handfuls of baby powder for you..

3. Hillary Clinton
Get out.. Leave.. It is no longer a race.. Check the new cover of TIME if you don’t believe me.. You are just wasting money and time.. If you’re for the party, then do what your colleagues are asking you to do.. Bounce.. Get gone.. It’s not a competition if you can’t win.. And at this point, you can’t win.. You tried.. You really did.. You lied.. You and your husband did something that I didn’t think was possible.. Loose the luster with Blacks.. I liked Billy.. I really did.. I always said that he spoke better for and about Black people than most Black people could.. Now, I can do without y’all.. Especially you, Hillary.. I know it’s not right to slap chicks, but you, my former friend, are deserving of one.. Even if it’s a nice, soft, playful one.. Just enough to put the nice handprint on your cheek.. You deserve it for just being this dang stubborn.. For changing your stance and lines to fit what you felt would generate more votes.. That’s so not gangsta..

4. Media
Y’all get this award for being too blatant with your racism.. Pacman Jones, Michael Vick, Carmelo Anthony, Cedric Benson, Barry Bonds, Roger Clemens.. One of those kids is doing their own thing.. Guess which one? That’s right, Mr. Clemens.. Mr. Cy Young.. Mr. Yankee.. Mr. I Can Get Paid $2 Million For Each Game I Play.. Mr. I Did Not Take Performing Enhancing Drugs, But My Head is the Size of Shaq’s Rims.. Mr. I Did Not Rape a 15-Year Old Country Singer, Even Though She Co-Signed the Allegation.. Mr. I Know I Was Married with 2 Kids at the Time.. Mr. I Will Use Your Wife, But I Won’t Steal Her From You.. Mr. My Trainer and Former Teammate/Training Partner Have No Idea What They Are Talking About When They Admitted That I Did It Too.. Come on now, enough is enough.. Media, you’re getting the smack, because through all of the recent news that came forward, you found a way to ensure that it wasn’t online or in your news.. I mean, nowhere.. It disappeared.. When the Vick non-sense came out, y’all had cameras around him 24/7.. Remember when Allen Iverson had that issue in Philly with his wife? When he went to find her after he got into an argument with her? Y’all camped out at his house for about 3 months.. Do you not know where Roger lives? Let me know, I can google it for you.. Barry Bonds can’t get a job.. Cedric Benson is being aired out one day about being one of the worst NFL dudes in the game, and when his friends and family come out in defense of him, you limit the airtime the story gets.. What’s up with that?? You blasted him for 2 straight days, and when accounts, pictures and 911 records came out to support what he was saying, the story no longer gets airplay?? What’s really going on? Where are our sportswriters at? Why are we not taking the time to defend one another? That’s so not gangsta..

5. Myself
I get a slap for staying away from y’all for so long..

So, yea, those are the initial awards.. Who else is up for nomination or a clear path to the slap?

AOG Series: From the Block to the Boardroom..

I love B.I.G., but we’re taking his rhymes a bit too seriously.. The man could definitely wax prophetic from line to line, verse to verse, song to song, but let’s move away from making his words the Ten Commandments of what we can become.. I know I have y’all wondering what I’m talking about, and I’ll get to it in a second..

I keep hearing the “voice” of our people (at least to mass media, which I disagree with) in magazines, interviews and every other outlet they can reach quoting BK’s finest..

“either you slang crack rock, or you gotta wicked jumpshot”..

Stop it!

I’m saying that with my Grandma’s (RIP) face on.. That no nonsense look she would give us spoke volumes.. No other words needed..

Stop it!

My jumper is sick (I know cuz I tried it out over the weekend after not taking a shot in a year), but my brother’s is sicker.. He dabbled on that other court too.. I didn’t.. He’s locked up again.. I’m out free with a legal team.. The fact is that we both grew up together.. The fact is that I didn’t choose those 2 avenues that leaves my brother facing yet another bid.. I did something different.. I went left.. I didn’t think it was crime or sports.. I saw crime and sports.. I played in 1 more than the other, cuz the other was just stupid.. But I knew I could get out.. Again, I went left.. All those others went right.. Going in circles and never got out.. That dude that was sick with his right hand, but couldn’t go left.. That dude never made it to college, cuz coaches knew he couldn’t go left.. Stuck..

Where’s the line, verse or song that talks about him having other options? Oh my bad, we can’t find it.. At least nothing that becomes a quotable for the potential talents we have in communities and neighborhoods across the country.. I’ma be real.. My jumper didn’t get me no further ahead in life.. High School? Man, yea, it felt good to have people shout your name.. College? Yea, it felt good to put it on dudes with scholarships.. Where does it leave us now?? The drug game? Well maybe Biggie didn’t lie about that! Pfizer has been killing the game to the tune of billions.. But that ain’t what we’re talking about..

We came from the block.. We built the block.. We built up the block.. We became the block.. Then we got stuck on our block.. A block most of us don’t want to live on.. That ain’t the part I’m mad about.. It’s about leaving the block and heading to the boardroom.. That can be corporate america, philanthropic work, church, wherever.. Just a place that you’re building up so that it’s not all about making it rain (bball reference or Pacman) or pushing weight..

Speaking of pushing weight, isn’t it ironic that the likelihood of those actions will leave you pushing weights in a facility that houses more Black men than most project buildings in the U.S.? I’m just sayin’..

Don’t get me wrong.. I’ve had visions of playing in the league.. That stopped when I realized that I was blessed with the short gene from my Mom.. Shoot, I’ve even sat and thought about how easy I felt the grassroots (peep the subliminal) game is.. Just seemed like with a little more common sense, we would see more Marlo moments than corner moments.. But I was smart enough to realize you can never be smart enough when you have to employ niggas.. I mean that not in a color sense, cuz I’ll use that term for any “ignant” mickey-fickey that I come across.. The whole drug game has a serious STD.. Those crabs are no joke.. All the more reason to stay protected, and in that game abstinence is the only way to avoid catching a case..

So, I’m calling on us to use another line.. Gangstas to use another verse.. Shoot, make your own song.. Just make it a different tune..

From the Block to the Boardroom..

A line to emulate..