My Rules..

in the spirit of Bill Maher, i'm coming up with my own take on New Rules.. if y'all don't know what i'm talking about, then you've missed one of the best shows on TV for some years now.. follow along.. you'll get it once you start reading them..

MY RULES:

1. Sequels should have to follow the previous movie.. Also, a prequel is not a sequel..

• First it was Scorpion King 2.. garbage.. hot garbage.. while it had something to do with Scorpion King, it was produced by a different company, directed by somebody who has no eye for talent, and it was a prequel!! it wasn't a sequel.. figure out a different naming convention.. joint was poop.. straight poop..
• Belly 2.. garbage.. not necessarily hot, but still garbage.. first, it had NOTHING to do with the original Belly.. i liked that movie.. it's one of my favorite movies.. yes, Nas' acting was horrible, and so was T-Boz and a bunch of others, but the movie had a story.. a plot.. i could follow it, even if i had to mute certain scenes.. i liked it.. a hood classic.. but Belly 2? with The Game?? come on now.. that joint was pitiful.. first of all it was made without anyone knowing it was made.. then it popped up on DVD.. had us all amped (ok, maybe not amped) to see it.. it was 1st on my Netflix Queue.. garbage.. they should be ashamed of themselves..

1. Blogger needs to fix its' numbering system.. i'm just saying..

• why does it pick up at #1 again? sigh..

1. Animals need to find ways to make money

• if i'm in a recession, so are you.. pets need to make their own dang money.. my cat was better when times were better.. he was more active.. he played more games.. had more tricks up his sleeve.. now? with the recession.. this dude is lazy.. he's getting the same treatment, but he's doing less.. i don't get it.. a fly will be right in front of him, and he'll just ignore it.. what's up with that?? a fly will have to walk to him - not fly, but walk - for him to even react to it.. then he'll catch it, and just let it go.. what's with that? i call it laziness.. and i'm thinking that if he's going to be lazy, then he needs to have an income..

1. Magazines need to change their name to "Ads with a couple stories"..

• every month i'm seeing more ads and less content/news in the magazines that i like.. that's cool.. gotta make your money.. but let's stop fooling ourselves.. those are no longer news magazines.. not current events.. nothing.. those are ad books.. if your first story starts on page 78, then you are no longer qualified to be a magazine..

1. No more taking pics of your baby on the phone, nor sending them to a person's phone..

• i'm going to catch hell for this, but y'all need to stop.. i've had too many baby pics recently be sent to me via email and on my blackberry.. those pics made the babies look like aliens.. that's at least what i'm claiming, cuz i can't believe a baby would have a head that's bigger than its entire body.. and that's what i've been seeing.. i'm ignorant.. ignant.. i don't know any better.. i see those pics (and they can be family too), and i'm ready to disown that family member.. on some, "nah, b, that baby ain't no kin to me!".. i know y'all don't believe me, but i showed a few to some friends, and they co-signed it.. they thought i was just talking trash until they saw them for themselves.. babies looking like extras from the new X-Files movie.. i'm just sayin'..